The Lost Generation

Syria. What a fucking mess. Worst humanitarian disaster of our time. This photo {quazi} woke up the world when it went viral. It's probably going to be "too much to see" but Jesus, is this what has to be seen for us to realize what's going on? The body of 3 year old, Aylan, washed up on shore, face down in the sand. He drowned trying to flee his God forsaken country in a boat with his mother and brother who also died when the boat cap-sized.

What's eve worse, is children, elderly, and people in general are dying every day in desperate need of escaping the worst civil war in our time. 7.6 million people have fled Syria since March 2011 while we sit on our ass looking at new ways to decorate the living room. What a disgrace. Are we that self absorbed?

Between Syria's civil war, and the rise of Isis, the world is in the worst refugee crisis since World War II. Over 11 million people are displaced because of it and roughly 240,000 have died.

But we don't care, do we? We'd rather browse Facebook to see what our friends are doing this weekend, and catch up on the latest drama. The bars and the beaches are flooded this Labor Day weekend with people enjoying a day off. Let's not forget about the people who haven't had a day off in over four years out of fear they will be killed. This little boy was born into the same war that killed him. His 3rd birthday was surrounded by refugees instead of friends, whatever he could find to eat instead of cake, and gunshots for candles.

May God bless what's less of that mess.

Taken from A Holy Experience, these are some of the things you can do to help: 

–> Mennonite Central Committee
–> World Relief (donate to provide backpacks for resettled children here)
–> World Vision
–> Samaritan’s Purse
–> Doctors Without Borders: Has three rescue ships in the Mediterranean, on Tuesday alone they rescued 1,658 people
–> UNICEF
–> Hand in Hand for Syria: Working within Syrian borders to provide aid. Donations are made via British currency but these are easily converted from US donations during the transaction.

If you’d like to help Syrian refugees stranded on the Greek Island of Lesvos, see the list below, and mail to:
Hellenic Postal Office of Mythymna
℅ The Captain’s Table
Molyvos 81108, Lesvos, Greece

ITEMS TO SEND for SYRIAN REFUGEES on GREEK ISLAND OF LESVOS:

Sneakers, gym shoes for men, women and children (all sizes) are a HIGH PRIORITY
Sweatpants of all sizes.
Briefs/underwear for men, women and children (all sizes)
Men’s trousers (small, medium and large) and shoes
Baby powder milk
Any non-perishables like nut butters or other long-lasting foods.
Diapers
Feminine products
Sleeping bags
Plastic to cover the floor/for shade
Tents/tarpaulin
Mats (camping or yoga mats)
Hats and caps for sunshade (adults and children/light colours because of the sun)
Electric Plug for multiple devices (european voltage)

When it's all said and done - PRAY. Pray for these children who will be lost forever in a world who won't save them. For the girl forcing a smile, for the boy who put his hands up because he thought a camera was a gun, and for the little girl who doesn't think her baby doll should see it all. Who's covering her eyes? 

Let's uncover ours. 

Make sure your love runs deep enough to affect your hospitality, empathy, fidelity, and contentment. 
Hebrews 13:5 

Ramblings on the Road

A clear day greeted us on our long drive to Fairbanks for our weekly supply of groceries. I was in the back of the van, head on the window, looking at anything and everything as we passed. The co-pilot Dave was starting to doze off, Brian was in the zone, driving with his Monster in hand, both Nick and Matt were in the row behind me on the lookout just like I was.

Then I heard it: "hey look, McKinley is out!"I looked back to my left, and even from a hundred miles away, it was the most prominent mountain in sight. I don't know when I became so emotional, but I almost cried seeing it. I looked back any time I knew there would be an opportunity to see it through trees and ranges. I couldn't get enough of it. I didn't get a photo, just like the first time I saw the northern lights. I couldn't even think to get my camera. I just wanted to look at it.

Coming home, in the same spot and position, with my journal in hand, I wrote down my thoughts and everything I saw. My personal journals never go public, and things like that, in the van, I never really thought about until later that afternoon when Nick approached me in my hammock and asked "hey what were you writing earlier in the van?"

I was journaling at the time, listening to Matt play guitar as I played around writing lyrics. Instead of telling Nick what I wrote, I just handed my journal to him. He read what I wrote in the van, then turned to what I just wrote while in my hammock. He asked why I never put it on Facebook or share it with people. I told him he sounds like my family. And so I guess to answer him, I don't really know. Maybe it's the feared scrutiny or just the sake of keeping my thoughts private, but whatever the reason, I journal because that's how I process my thoughts, I don't do it for recognition.

But for Nick, if he ever finds this blog, and for my family and closest friends, who I know read it, I'll leave you with my drive to Fairbanks:

Meet me in this place of wild
Find open roads to mountains and rivers.
The air is crisp, the sun is out
Drive for hours in silence.

Nature speaks - though quiet- so loud
Beyond the spruce trees and vast land
There's Mt. McKinley claiming her lot
Proud with beauty, never ceasing.

Jet streaks leave a trace behind
Then leaves the sky to be.
Snow starts melting
Leaves start changing
Showing signs of spring.

The ranges take over the open land
This place is bigger than life.
Valleys of green inviting rivers to flow
The seasons they change over night.

The spirit of Alaska runs wild
for those open to let it take hold.
---------------------------------------------

Photos from the road this weekend (McKinley, Easter, and Northern Lights to come on the next blog)







"We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect." - Anais Nin
"A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song." - Unknown

The Good Life > American Dream

The American Dream. What is it? Living the good life. What does that mean?

I've lived the high life, making plenty of money, going on weekend getaways, enjoying happy hour three nights a week, going on 10 days of vacation because that's what my "good job" allotted me. All I needed was a sexy husband and two kids, and I was living the dream. Oh, the American Dream, it's what we all strive for.

Except, I don't want the American Dream, I want to live my dream.

I want to live the good life, finding beauty all around me. Seek love, and hold on to it. See the world, and share it with those around me. Let God speak to me through nature. Be drawn to tears in awe of the magnificence we call earth. Breathe in clean mountain air. Sleep outside. Share conversation with a stranger. Invite the world to change me so I can change the world. Do things that make me feel good. Isn't that the good life?

For the next 6 months, Alaska is where I'll be. Welcome to Denali.

"The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul." Psalm 23:1-3 

Third Time's a Charm - Vinny {Part 3}

After last night's hour of heart break with Vinny, his anger, doubting of God, and giving up hope, I really needed a night  to catch my breathe. 

Getting onto the freeway, I looked back to the offramp to see if Vinny was there. I had red vines, cereal, and a bike lock to deliver in hopes to make up for his previous night of despair. He was there, so I was excited to catch him on the way home. 

So I went to Barnes and Noble,  picked up the book I've been meaning to for over a month, and looked for a corner to sit on the floor and read. I can spend hours at the bookstore, and I often times do, reading a book to see if I actually want to buy it. No open corners. It was crowded. I had a happy delivery to make anyway so I bought my book and headed home. 

I got off the freeway only to find empty sidewalk. Where the heck? I drove around, went to Rite Aid for a chocolate chip ice cream cone (I love solo date nights, dontjudgeme), then finally went back around full circle. I started at the 76 station and decided I'd make my way back and if I didn't see him, then maybe tomorrow. 

I drove by 76, and saw a green shirt inside the store. Jackpot!

I pulled up to Vinny, Sam (the attendant), and another guy with a van. He has just been delivered a new bike. When Vinny saw me, he yelled back to Sam, "Look! She's here! I told you she'd bring me a lock!" Sam and his friend turned around to me but I was looking at Vinny's face. Pure joy. 

I told him Stacey went straight to Target after hearing about his bike being stolen, and she bought a bike lock along with half a tub of red vines. He told Sam we were like two daughters looking after him. 

"Well," Sam said, "that's good and I'm happy you're in a better mood because last night you were so angry." Apparently I wasn't the only one who got the cold shoulder. 

But you know what Vinny said?

"Yeah I was... but hey! Today is a new day for new beginnings and I'm going to focus on that." 

This is a photo of Vinny, Sam, and Vinny's new bike (and bike lock around his neck so he wouldn't lose it.) I should really get a camera, but until then, enjoy the flip phone photo. 

 

At home opening my new book, The Irresistible Revolution, the first line caught my attention:

"While the voices of blockbuster movies and pop culture cry out for a life outside the matrix of numb efficiency, Christianity often has offered little to the world, other than the hope that things will be better in heaven."  

I dunno, why can't we make them better for people like Vinny today? 

______

"There is a lot that happens around the world we cannot control. We cannot stop earthquakes, we cannot prevent droughts, and we cannot prevent all conflict, but when we know where the hungry, the homeless and the sick exist, then we can help." -Jan Schakowsky

"If God's love is for anybody anywhere, it's for everybody everywhere." -Edward Lawlor

Giving Up On God - Vinny {Part 2}

I wasn't going to write more than I already had regarding Vinny. Then Sis called and told me people want to follow his story, the good, and the bad. So here it is...

Monday night, I left Lauren's show in Orange County at 11pm. I got to the Blaine offramp in Riverside at 11:45pm. I was tired, but my mind was wide awake.

There he was. In the same green shirt, same black hat, same blank stare I'd seen before. Opposite of me, his body was awake, but his mind was tired.

I got the green light and drove by, waving a peace sign to him. He waved back, with a weak, "Hey Bec." Dolly was with him, the new girl on the streets, and I wanted to meet her anyway.

To the 76 station I went. Looked for the attendant to tell him I was parking to go see Vinny, but he was long gone. It was midnight by now. Not many people were out.

I had almonds, but he only has two teeth and can't eat them so I walked over empty handed, full hearted and ready to talk. He didn't even move when I got there. Just kept standing there, leaning on the guard rail, with his sign reading, "Betcha can't hit an old vet with a quarter!"

"Hi, I'm Becca. You must be Dolly," I said to the blonde lady sitting on the ground.

Vinny told me the week before about Dolly. He told me to look for her. She was blonde, late 40's, new to the streets and he was showing her the ropes. Someone stole her backpack that previous week and she was feeling low, so he wanted me to give her words of encouragement whenever I did see her.

"I am Dolly! It's nice to meet you, Becca." She gave me a light smile, then laid down, put a fleece blanket on the ground, then covered her entire body and head to keep the crickets from jumping into bed with her.

I walked over five feet to Vinny. Still staring out to an empty offramp.

"Hey Vinny," I said slowly.
"...hey"

::silence::

His eyes got teary, he wasn't looking at me yet.

"So... my bike got stolen today," he said as he slowly turned his eyes to me.
"Oh Vinny," I said, "AGAIN?"

Dolly jumped up from her bed, shaking her hair out, battle lost to the crickets, "Wait, it's already happened?"
"Yeah," I told her. "That's two times this month."
I looked to Vinny again, getting teary myself, "Vinny I'm so sorry."
"That's okay, at least they cut my bags off before taking it."

{God, please give me the words to say to this man. Or send either Pastor Eric or Johannes to come save me with their words;  however I know that's impossible at this hour for either one of them to be conveniently coming off this ramp. Back to my original prayer. Please give me the words to say. Please. Amen}

::silence::

"Ya know, all we gotta do in this world is live and die. Sometimes, I just wish it would hurry up."
{What is he saying, why is he saying this... Ohhhhh God where are you?}
"I just don't want to keep on living like this. I think Jesus loves to pick on the miserable because I am absolutely miserable. Why does He keep doing this to me?"
"Vinny..."
"No, you know what, I think Jesus is running from the battle He has with Satan. He's a COWARD! Why doesn't He just end it all? End it all right now."

::silence::

"Vinny... He won't give you more than you can handle. He picks on the strong, not the weak."
"Yeah well, what's the point of me praying anymore anyway. I ask, he never answers."
"He always answers, it's just not always what you want to hear."
"I don't want to be here anymore."

::silence::

"I tell you what, I didn't pray for that man to steal my bike, nope. I'm a good man, and bad shit just keeps happening to me and I'm tired of it."

::silence::

"And no one gives a shit about me. You think my family is out there looking for me? Hell no, I wouldn't want to see them anyway even if they did."

::silence::

"And why do the rich have everything? They're evil, all of them. I have nothing, and keep being thrown to the ground."
"Blessed are the-"
"I don't give a rat's ass. Jesus wants to keep making my life miserable. He's a coward. So one man sinned, and we're all sinners living in misery for the rest of time? That sounds selfish if you ask me."
"Vinny, I wish I had words."

He stopped, looked at me with tearful eyes, and he smiled.
"That's okay. Sometimes the best listeners are just that. You don't have to say anything. I'm thankful you're here."

{Thank you}

"That's the spirit. Hold on to the good in life. Look at Dolly. You have a companion now. Look at your stuff, you still have that. Look at Stacey and I, we love you. And whether or not you believe it, Jesus hasn't left you."
"...yeah I guess so. I'm just tired of it sometimes. I'm okay though, and I'll get another bike tomorrow from a friend."
"Then I'd better get you a bike lock," I said jokingly trying to lighten the mood.

We both laughed, but inside we were both desperate for a change. I left that night, feeling defeated and totally heart broken. I was afraid to leave him, in fear he might take his life. I prayed for words, and God gave me silence. Maybe there was a reason for that.

Hopefully we'll find out soon.

_____

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." -Phillippians 4:6

"Answer me when I call to you, O my righteous God. Give me relief from my distress; be merciful to me and hear my prayer." -Psalm 4:1

"Some of God's greatest gifts, are unanswered prayers." -Garth Brooks

Conviction Meets Calling

Three months ago, on June 2, 2013, my life was changed forever. All because of one man.

Stace and I had just gotten out of church to meet my dad for dinner. We were running late, and she wasn't paying attention when she rear ended a limo driver who spoke very little English. Frazzled, she spoke with her insurance while I kept the man in good spirits. 

We were on our way after 20 minutes or so, had dinner, laughed it off with my dad, all was fine. Except Stacey was still beating herself up for having been so oblivious to the car in front of her. 

It was late, we were tired, both in need of a mood lifter. 

That's when we saw a homeless man, sitting on the ground, not really paying much attention to people driving by. All day, every day, someone is standing on this corner begging. This man couldn't be bothered. He didn't even look up. 

We got the green light. "Whew" is usually the sigh of relief for most people. No one likes to be the person stopped at the red light next to a homeless person looking you right in the eyes, hoping for something. Not us. This was what we needed. 

Stacey looked over at him as she drove past him. Then she looked at me. 

"I feel like we need to get that guy something," she said. 

"Yeah? Like what?"

"I dunno, let's go to the gas station." 

{As a side note: I am a total softy when it comes to homeless people. You might disagree with this next statement, but in truth, I simply don't care. My Nonnie taught me that God put that person in front of you to give; not to judge. Whatever they do with it afterwards is between them and God. It's not your sword to swing, you did your job. Take that however you want; it's not for everyone} 

We parked, picked up some red vines (because who doesn't love red vines), water, and some other random things we both thought we'd want if we were on the streets. We asked the attendant if he wouldn't mind us parking at the gas station for a bit while we walked down the street. 

We were on our way to see the homeless man, in hopes to maybe pray over him and shed some light on a dark, lonely evening.  We were not prepared for what happened next. 

He appeared to be on the streets for a while. He was in his late 50's sporting a massive beard, long grey hair, a hat, and a serious runny nose. 

He was happy to see two young ladies heading his way, and we... well we were all of a sudden in a hurry to get out of there. He spoke fast, but not jibberish. He was educated. Very educated. Clearly he was on something, but we didn't know what. "I LOVE red vines!" Well, at least we nailed that one. 

We gave each other the "let's give this five minutes and get out of here" look, but he just kept on talking about this and that. He told me, "I bet you don't last 20 minutes talking to me because by that time, this snot will reach the bottom of my nose and you'll be so grossed out, you'll run." 

He was right. It was gross. But something happened. We stayed. We listened. We quietly prayed. 

An hour later, the snot reached well beyond the bottom of his nose. He was becoming very passionate about his rants and with every word, I would just stare at it... waiting for that slimy goo to come flying across and hit me in my own mouth. 

We found out his name was Vinny. He was 57 years old and had been on the streets for 26 of those years. We wanted so badly to just pray over him, and be on our way, maybe to catch him again on a sober day. This wasn't turning out the way we had planned... does anything? 

Late turned into really late, and we needed to get going. That's when a friend of Vinny rolled up on his bike. His name was Randall. By this time, Vinny was tired of talking to us, so he want back to his post, sat down, and continued rambling to himself. 

Randall was well kept, very sober, and didn't appear to be homeless (he told us later he has a place to stay, but that's about it). With his bike and cigarette in hand, he asked how - and what - we were doing in the area. 

We explained our night, how we saw Vinny, and felt the pull to come meet him before heading home.

"Vin Dog is a real good friend of mine," he said. "That man needs a lot of prayer." 

Stacey looked at me, with eyes lit up. 

"Actually, that's why we came over here. We were hoping to pray over him," she said. 

"Well," he replied, "why don't we do it now?" 

Wow...

Stace and I looked at each other, completely taken back by his response. 

"Absolutely," we both said. 

Without hesitation, he put his bike down, along with his cigarette, grabbed both our hands, and he prayed right there with traffic flying by us. I squeezed Stacey's hand in disbelief. 

"Dear God, I thank you for this night. I thank you for all the beauty in this world and for people like Stacey and Rebecca, for stopping by and spending time with Vinny. He needs your help and we ask for you to watch over him." 

We were both weeping. I don't even remember what else he said in his prayer, and it didn't matter. I was blown away.  We left, moods beyond lifted, knowing we'd be back to visit Vinny, even if he didn't remember talking to us. 

Two weeks later, Stacey passed him off the freeway, with red vines in her hand ready to pass off. 

"Hi Stacey!!"  

No. Way. He remembered. 

She called me and told me to go see him. So I did. And he was sober. 

He apologized for that night, and he opened up to me about his life growing up in Huntington Park, his daughter Heather (somewhere out there), the day his cousin offered him methamphetamine in his teen years to kick a migraine, and how he wished it never happened. He hates when people drive past him just to yell at him to get a job, he loves mixing every kind of cereal he can get his hands on, pouring milk straight into the box, and eating it just like that. He told me he'd rather have 20 minutes of conversation with someone than $100. 

I've seen him a number of times since then, and the gas attendant now knows who I'm going to visit, bringing him a few of his favorite things, and meeting some of the other guys (and girl) in the neighborhood. He lives right behind Sandals Church, and my hope is to one day have him accept my invite to a service. 

Today, I went to the Woodcrest campus and it was the most powerful service I've been to in years. God reached right into my heart and tugged on the strings. So much so, that I wept the entire time. It was a service of prayer. Pastor Matt asked us to write down a name that only we can reach (Philemon 1:4).

I wrote down Vinny. 

He told us to pray for the following: 

- Make God real to them, no matter what it takes.

- Block the enemy from them (God doesn't change hearts, he only softens them).

- Ask God to help me pray for them. (2 Corinthians 4:4) 

This man is the focus of my prayers, and if you see him standing on Blaine off the 215S, tell him I said so. 

"In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work, we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'"

Acts 20:35

Praise You In This Storm - Part Two

I've written about this here a while back, and I think it's important to be reminded of the events shaping this world. Media insists on highlighting the tragedies, and I think it's just as crucial to see the beauty we're holding on to. I pray for both; thanking God for my abundance of undeserved blessings, and that He would bless those less fortunate than I am.

Below are just a few of many events going on today.

The Ugly:
Syria continues to be volatile, with at least 93,000 deaths as of 2011 (The Independent).
More than two dozen wild fires are burning from Alaska to New Mexico (US News). 
Egyptian Civil War growing with hate (Aljazeera).

The Beautiful: 
Plane crash with 307 passengers, miraculously only took two lives (fortunately for them, they were believers in Christ) (China Daily).
Equality for all in the state of California (ABC).
Human waste turning into help for Haiti (Positive News). - If you're tired of depressing news like I am, check this page out.

Romans 8:28
"And we know that in all things, God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

One Wish

The recent video on Gadling  is a great representation of what's real in our world right now, regardless of where we come from and what we believe in. They asked a variety of people in Jerusalem, if they had one wish, what it would be.

While in Montana with my grandparents, I've had a lot of time to just be, and consider what's important in my life and what truly isn't. I believe people are only as busy as they want to be, and we should never confuse activity with productivity. I now do what makes me happy, be with the people who matter to me, and I leave everything else behind. And I feel more fulfilled than I ever have.

I'm realizing while I'm up here, I'm on earth for a very short time, and so are the people I love most. So I've stopped worrying and even complaining about things out of my control, and I'm focusing on what's been given to me right now at this moment.

Not losing my patience with Nonnie as she asks me for the fifth time in 10 minutes if we need to go to the store for milk, or listening to my grandfather tell me the same story he told me the night before and just sitting there for an hour like it was the first time he told me; these are times when I need to be still, and cherish every moment while I still have them.

My wish is for everyone to stop and think about what's really important in life and to take advantage of it while it's still in front of them.

"You can give without loving, but you cannot love without giving." - Rick Warren

Happiness

Currently, Andrew and I are en route north at Playa Ventura somewhere between Huatulco and Acapulco. I'm watching the sun rise with a cup of cinnamon coffee, listening to the waves and Marc Cohn, thankful as ever. Pelicans are flying by, low over the ocean. Up, down, side to side, they are in perfect, effortless unison. What a life that must be.

It's funny though, how I have to watch this morning routine of theirs in order to appreciate my own blessings in life. I'm sure somewhere, someone has watched me in the ocean, early in the morning, wishing they had my life as they drank their cup of joe.

In his book, "The Age of Absurdity," Michael Foley translates Jacques Rousseau's vision of happiness: "if you have it, you can't be aware of it, and if you are aware of it, you can't have it." He also makes the point of happiness sometimes being recognized only retrospectively, after it's lost.

It's easy to look in my memory bank to remember some of life's greatest times, but to be present and happy in the moment sometimes slips away from me. Always trying to make something what it used to be, or what it could be, when in reality, I'm going to look back at this morning and realize how perfect it was.

It's a good thing the morning isn't over and I still have time to appreciate it. Life is good, and I'm as happy as I've ever been. Now it's time to swim with the pelicans.

"God cannot give us a happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing."- C.S. Lewis

Rainy Days

Today, I woke up home sick. Nothing in particular sparked it, but I felt so far away from home, I actually started crying. I didn't know how to get ahold of myself so I went for a walk and asked God to come with me. Different prayers came to the surface of my thoughts and all I did was embrace the storm passing through. 

I thought of my little sister who just got engaged to her high school sweetheart. I thought of my niece, my best girl, growing so fast and prays for me every day on her own as she says, “Bebba, safe, Mexico.” I thought of Sis who is two months from giving birth to my nephew and two weeks from moving into their new home and needs me now more than ever. I thought of my little brother who is doing amazing things with the church and taking risks going to Juarez to share with the people of Mexico. I thought of my parents who worry about me more than they need to. All I could do was cry. 

12 years later, she circled "yes"

All these thoughts and worries came storming though all at once and I was overwhelmed. Then I remembered a quote I read recently by Freya Stark: “To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.”  Of the 308 million-plus citizens in the United States, 30% have passports (CNN 2011). Everyone dreams of traveling the world, but very few actually do it. I'm one of the lucky few, living the dream. Not the American dream, but my own.

Before walking back to the house, I noticed an old woman in her apron carrying a bucket full of something heavy. With very little effort, she hiked up the hill with a smile on her face. She stopped and looked at me, as I sat on the sidewalk with my head in my hands and tears on my cheeks. She looked me right in the eye and said, “what a beautiful day it is today.” And she left, saying nothing more. 

I realized then how lucky I am to wake up in this foreign town, and the old woman who has probably never left this small town of Jacomulco, was here to remind me of the beauty of this world. Sometimes I get caught up in my own world and forget to look around to see what’s really going on. The world keeps on turning, with or without me and it's a beautiful thing. I'm traveling and that in itself is a blessing. Once home from Mexico, I will have no job, no money, no plan, and that's okay because someone else has it all mapped out for me. Bring on the rain. 

Matthew 6:3-4

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." 

Todo es Posible, Nada es Seguro

...so goes the motto of each new day in Mexico. 

Rafa on Big Banana (Left) and Tomata 1

The boys are going big here in Tlapacoyan starting with Galen, the invincible 17 year old from Ithaca, New York, who will run anything saying “it’s good to go.” A few days ago, camera crews arrived and offered to pay the $200 fee for Gaylin to extend his flight if they could get a shot of him running down Big Banana Falls. Without hesitation, he agreed and 12 hours later was charging down the 2nd largest waterfall in the world to be run in a kayak (128 feet). The next day, motivation and adrenalin ran through the rest of the boys and fired them up to run the smaller, yet stout, Tomata 1. 

Boomer decided it was time to ditch his kayak and take the 60 foot Tomata down with a stand up paddle board (yyyyyeah). It’s easy to get fired up here when camera crews and energy are never ending. All survived the day with a few aches and pains and after Riley had a not-so-good line and had to swim, Marlow told him, “your mum would eat you for breakfast!” but Riley was fine and still stoked on life (like always). I would have to say, I’m thankful none of these boys’ mothers are here because I’ve only known these guys for two weeks and I think my blood pressure has nearly doubled. 

Top Left: Ica charging Tomata, All the boys contemplating, Marlow on a sketchy ledge helping the camera crew
Bottom Left: Boomer and Tyler doing some yoga before the drop, Riley on his way down Tomata 

Tomata having its way with Boomer 

Contentment Through Simplicity

My family does a good job at keeping my birthday very simple, yet meaningful. The only two gifts I received before I left for Mexico, came from my sisters. The one in particular was from Joben. She got an idea from her previous travels, to give a small, plastic magnetic picture frame with a photo of us being silly (below). It’s light, doesn’t take up any packing room, and is a constant reminder of my family. On the back she wrote something short and sweet without getting too mushy, even though she probably wanted to. 

Today, I reached into my computer bag and pulled out the picture frame, only to have it fall apart on my bed. I thought I ruined it and was pretty bummed, but as I successfully put it back together, I noticed for the first time, an insert from her daily devotional (whether or not she put it there on purpose, I’m not sure). It reads like this: 

“I say it is better to be content with what little you have. Otherwise, you will always be struggling for more, and that is like chasing the wind.” -Ecclesiastes 4:6

“When it comes to evaluating your life, God’s scales weigh differently than yours. Seeing through His eyes, the smallest things can bring you the deepest joy. When you embrace your life just as it is, you can lay down the struggle for what might be or might have been. You can feel the lessing of contentment that, for this moment, your life is the perfect starting place for the next step in the journey.” 

The smallest things can indeed bring me deepest joy. It’s easy for me to get caught up in the world I live in, forgetting to be thankful for the little things. I’m lucky enough to have a little sister who can remind me through a piece of paper of how great my life is right where it is - not where I’ve been, or where I’m going or not going. Right here, right now, watching “How I Met Your Mother” from a computer, in a motel, drinking a $4 bottle of Sangria from a gas station in Mexico, while the town dries out from a hurricane, is exactly where I’m supposed to be. 

I don’t have to worry about where my life is going because that’s already handled for me. This clever little sister of mine, also added a useful Bible verse after her short and sweet note: 

“Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of it’s own.” - Matthew 6:34 

Look at Your Life, and Look at Your Choices

Another one from Jim's Daily Awakenings

"I knew a woman years ago who was very dissatisfied in her marriage. She felt misunderstood, unappreciated, and taken for granted by her husband. She was a very angry woman. Frankly, I never expected the marriage to survive. I saw her again last winter, and guess what? She's still married to the same man. I asked her, 'How's your marriage?'
'Pretty good,' she answered. I probed a little further. 'Did he change?'
'Nope,' she replied, 'he's about the same. I changed. Now I understand him better and love him more.'
She went on to explain that her change of attitude was the result of a spiritual awakening. When her attitude and perspective changed, her relationship with her husband was altered."

Before I begin some real talk, I must thank Tara Dean for the title of this blog. We used to say it to each other every day at work as a joke, and now I find it funny how real of a statement it is. Now put on your seat belts, it's about to get real in the Whole Foods Parking Lot. 

I read the above post yesterday  and felt instant conviction. This has been a very active occurrence in my life lately, especially with my family. We all have such different opinions of each other and how we live our lives. Just this morning I was telling my little sister how much happier I am after I stopped worrying so much about everything I can't control. 

I don't usually like to talk about personal things but I think everyone who follows my blog knows me well enough to know my family has had a long hard road to get back to where we are. The first picture reflects what I like to call the good years. We were poor as far as money went, but we were the most rich in happiness. Life happened, money came into the picture, attitudes changed and choices were made. I felt myself feeling like the whiter the picket fence, the darker it was inside. 

When my parents were going through their separation, I felt so obligated to make sure everyone was happy, and I tried to fix my parents and the way they treated each other. I even lied to my family and told them I didn't get accepted in the study abroad program in Spain because I felt like they needed me. Finally something in me snapped when I realized, I couldn't change anything except my own life and attitude. I stopped worrying about my parents because only they could fix their marriage and their attitudes. Almost 20 years from the date of this photo, my siblings and I decided to take the same photo in the same location. We pulled together and realized that we can't fix anything, but we could choose to stay together in love even though our parents weren't going to stay married. We changed our "poor me" attitudes and made sure to make the best of what we did have - each other. 

I took it into even further categories of life such as baby names- it's not my kid, why do I care what people name it? The one everyone is guilty of; the people my friends date. They might not be my type but I don't have to date them so why put so much effort into making sure they fit my qualifications?

Taking it one step further, my sister and I were talking about a book that she wants me to read called 5 Love Languages. It helps you understand how your significant other communicates. She swears my parents could have stayed together if they read this. It talks about how one of us in the relationship might need more affection while the other needs acts of service (washing your car). If you know what the other person needs (what language they speak), it's easier to love them and let them feel loved. It all comes full circle when you think about it. Only I can control the way I act, feel, and love. Happiness and love are choices and nothing more. 

Everything is a choice, even the person you choose to spend the rest of your life with. My friend's mom told her that she wakes up every morning and CHOOSES to be married to her husband. She's not stuck with him, she chose him and does so actively every day. We choose who we want to be in life. At the moment, I choose to be unemployed and travel the world. I get a lot of criticism for it because some people think it's irresponsible, and some of the places too dangerous, but they're not going- I am. The great thing about choices is I can change them. Maybe we can all look at our own lives and choices instead of other's and see who really needs to do the changing. Most likely, it's our own. 


Philippians 4:11-12

I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation,whether well fed or hungry,whether living in plenty or in want.

La Buena Vida

John Wooden once said to surround yourself with people strong enough to change your mind. I've done a pretty good job of surrounding myself with good people who love me even when I'm stubborn. I'm making some big life changes with the support of my friends and family who understand who I am and where my passions lie. 

Recently God has opened my eyes and reminded me of His control over my life. I'm leaving in two months on a one-way ticket for the south pacific, but I'm really excited to head back into central and south America. Latin America has a culture I can't seem to fall out of love with and it seems to keep reappearing in my thoughts when I think of long term plans. I trust God and constantly refer back to my favorite bible verse, Proverbs 3:5-6. I have to remember I'm not in charge. My heart is wide open at this point and I'm listening. I don't know why, but all I hear is Mexico? Vamos a ver lo que va a pasar.

Here are some snapshots of the last month and the amazing people who surround me while I soak up the last few months at home. This is indeed la buena vida. 

Jay talking to me on the phone, father's day, impromptu trip to six flags, taco night with the roomie, happy hour with Robert, my first fish at the Kern, Pioneer town, Joshua Tree 

Proverbs 3:5-6

"Trust in the Lord with all our heart and lean not on your own understandings. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will lead your paths straight." 

What's on Your Mind?

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me. Well now that's just not true. 

All day. Every day. People talk about people. They can't help it, it's innate. It's easy to talk about other people especially when that person is the only thing we have in common with someone. However, if that person were in the room with you, would you be able to say those things to them? Probably not.

My new years resolution last year was to stop gossiping. I did really good for the first few months, then I noticed I wasn't doing so great. My little brother went cold turkey this year and he's much quieter in conversations now. I have to make a conscious effort to listen more than I speak. I now count to 3 before responding to people. I'm not always good but I do my best.

Ultimately, I want my friends and family to know when they tell me something about someone else, I don't repeat it. My belief is, if someone will gossip to you, they will gossip about you. If you talk about someone, make it something positive and encouraging.

Ephesians 4:29
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

What Happens in Vegas

Breaking bad news is never an easy thing to do. It’s especially difficult if it’s not our news to break. But where do we, as friends, draw the line in telling the people we love news that will shatter them forever?

Do we look the other way and hope someone else says something? Do we let them know immediately? Sometimes delivering bad news is harder than receiving it but how long can we let these things drag out until enough is enough?

Sooner is better. In person is best. Either way, just say it.

John 8:32

“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”