Rainy Days

Today, I woke up home sick. Nothing in particular sparked it, but I felt so far away from home, I actually started crying. I didn't know how to get ahold of myself so I went for a walk and asked God to come with me. Different prayers came to the surface of my thoughts and all I did was embrace the storm passing through. 

I thought of my little sister who just got engaged to her high school sweetheart. I thought of my niece, my best girl, growing so fast and prays for me every day on her own as she says, “Bebba, safe, Mexico.” I thought of Sis who is two months from giving birth to my nephew and two weeks from moving into their new home and needs me now more than ever. I thought of my little brother who is doing amazing things with the church and taking risks going to Juarez to share with the people of Mexico. I thought of my parents who worry about me more than they need to. All I could do was cry. 

12 years later, she circled "yes"

All these thoughts and worries came storming though all at once and I was overwhelmed. Then I remembered a quote I read recently by Freya Stark: “To awaken quite alone in a strange town is one of the pleasantest sensations in the world.”  Of the 308 million-plus citizens in the United States, 30% have passports (CNN 2011). Everyone dreams of traveling the world, but very few actually do it. I'm one of the lucky few, living the dream. Not the American dream, but my own.

Before walking back to the house, I noticed an old woman in her apron carrying a bucket full of something heavy. With very little effort, she hiked up the hill with a smile on her face. She stopped and looked at me, as I sat on the sidewalk with my head in my hands and tears on my cheeks. She looked me right in the eye and said, “what a beautiful day it is today.” And she left, saying nothing more. 

I realized then how lucky I am to wake up in this foreign town, and the old woman who has probably never left this small town of Jacomulco, was here to remind me of the beauty of this world. Sometimes I get caught up in my own world and forget to look around to see what’s really going on. The world keeps on turning, with or without me and it's a beautiful thing. I'm traveling and that in itself is a blessing. Once home from Mexico, I will have no job, no money, no plan, and that's okay because someone else has it all mapped out for me. Bring on the rain. 

Matthew 6:3-4

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."